Friday, April 19, 2013

Failing? Who? Me, My Grandson or God?

Well a few days ago I wrote a post about the issues of ADHD hopefully coming to an end with a new homeopathic treatment we have begun.  Let us just say that post was a bit tooooo optimistic.  Yeah, not so much on the road yet.  It seems the first few days were heaven sent or were they?  Right, that is the 'not so much' part. 

First let me say that I am not writing this for anyone to feel sorry for me and I don't really expect anything except that maybe someone out there has the same type of issues going on even if less severe and to let you know that you are not alone. I think we must all have some of this and are simply too ashamed of ourselves to put it in writing for all to see.  I think that this is one of God's answers to me, put it out there and let everyone know that you are no different, you have problems too. If you do and you would like to leave a comment, please feel free to do so or if you have questions, please feel free to ask, I will respond as I am able.

For two days now we have had meltdowns, his and ours and his and mine.  First it was over the school work, then it explodes into every aspect of our lives.  Second it was over taking his nightly medication, which is not really medication, he takes a supplement of melatonin at night in order to get to and stay asleep.

This child was sleeping through the night at 3 weeks of age, but for the last couple of years, it either takes hours for him to get to sleep or when he does, he does not stay asleep, so we, after talking to his doctor began giving him a small dosage of melatonin at night.  Melatonin is a naturally occurring substance in the body and when given in the evening it simply relaxes the body and mind so that sleep can occur naturally. Last night, he just simple refused to take it and when he finally did, he would not drink anything with it and got choked and threw up. What a mess.Then he started screaming at us about it and one thing led to another til finally I crushed it up in his water and put it into a syringe and just basically forced it down his throat.  Mind you this was already nearly 9:30 pm which is a bit late for him anyway since no matter what time he goes to bed his is up not later than 7 am.  So that being said.  I feel like a monster.

Many hurtful words have been said between me and my grandson this week on those two occasions from "why are you so mean" to "Mimi, I just hate you and want you to leave" to me feeling that I hate him as well, (I DO NOT), many tears and screaming and yelling for absolutely no reason.

I have cried over this, prayed over this and in general just think about this most of the time, still no answers.  No answers from God, no answers from my own thoughts, nothing, nada.

Still searching for the answer and waiting on the Lord for some guidance. We did not do school yesterday and we are not doing school today, taking a bit of a break just to allow us both to relax a bit.

On the bright side, we picked up his glasses yesterday afternoon and he is happy that now he can read and realizes that he can see so much better.  Thank God for that.

I hope that everyone has a wonderful weekend of happiness and peace.

May God Bless you all.

Be Blessed
Mimi

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